When anger rises

Interactive Exercises · 3 min

A short pause between the feeling and the reaction

Use this the moment you feel heat rising. The goal is not to never be angry, only to choose what you do next.

Steps

1. Stop talking. Even mid-sentence is fine.
2. If you're standing, sit down. If you're sitting, lean back.
3. Breathe out slowly, longer than you breathe in. Do this three times.
4. Name it to yourself: "I'm angry because…"
5. Ask: what do I actually want to happen here? Then decide whether to speak now or later.

Please also: If anger is leading to hitting, breaking things or frightening people at home, please talk to a counsellor. It can change.

From the Quran & Sunnah

• Anger

More on Understanding emotions

• Naming what you feel: Why putting a word to a feeling makes it lighter
• What's weighing on you?: A gentle reflection to untangle a heavy day